Parent Coaching Case Studies

Seven and a half months

James at 7 ½ months was unable to resettle himself after one sleep cycle during both the day and night.  He had learnt that if he vomited his would be picked up.  His parents were desperate for a good nights sleep. 

We called Cradle 2 Kindy to help me establish a sleeping routine for James as he had deteriorated over a four to six week period to about two twenty-minute naps during the day and was waking up nearly every hour during the night. 

I had tried breast feeding on demand, a bottle of formula, dummy (needing to be put back in every hour), music, rocking and patting to no avail.  He cried until I came to settle him which usually only took ten to fifteen minutes, went back to sleep only to wake soon after and not be able to put himself back to sleep.  His crying was so loud and stressful he sometimes made himself sick in the cot.  We were concerned about all the noise for the neighbours and street so always rushed into him before he was beside himself.  My husband had even stood in the street to check out the noise levels. 

I read Baby Love and other books on controlled crying to see if I could do something myself, but always found that I could not commit to the procedures as there was always an excuse in my mind as to why he was crying - like hunger, teething, injections, cold etc.   I was so tired after six weeks I felt like a zombie.  I was not enjoying each day, as little things upset me that never would have before.  I knew tiredness was the only problem but couldn’t see the way to fix it for both of our benefits.  I knew the poor sleep James was having for this age wasn’t doing him any good either, so felt something had to be done.

Cradle 2 Kindy techniques had helped a girlfriend with her baby in the early months so her recommendation was essential.

I discussed my problem with our parenting coach over the phone and booked a time for two weeks later.  I was concerned about the “control crying” aspect of settling but our coach described the method she used as “comforting”. … what a difference a definition makes!  I felt better already and sure I was going to be able to work it out. 

Over the twenty-four hours our coach visited us we learnt all about Sleep SolutionsTM for infants.  Once I understood the technique, its variations and the need to teach him a routine, it all became so clear.  I had really just needed someone to guide me through the initial long periods of crying, assuring me that all my concerns (hunger, dummy etc) were not the problem but James merely needed to learn the ability to resettle himself after periods of waking.  He slept through the night on the second night.  I learnt sleep induces sleep.  Once the technique was applied through the day as well as the night, we were having two proper sleeps a day (sometimes for two hours) followed by 7 pm to 6 am night sleeps.  We added a small 120 ml bottle feed at 10.30 pm to be sure he was satisfied and slept through.  He only required this extra feed for three weeks.  Sure, there were days or night following that were not perfect, but I now know what to do in these circumstances which fixed the problem for the next sleep.

The main difficulties with sleep and settling babies were so easily overcome once I was confident in the routine I established.  I was so happy knowing it worked for us!       Julie – Paddington, NSW

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Twelve months old

Alex was a twelve-month old with night waking issues.  He desperately needed to learn how to self settle.  Perseverance, consistency and determination saw a quick response from Alex.

With trepidation we decided (well, I decided and my husband didn’t protest too loudly) to embark on a sleep and settling venture with our twelve-month old baby.  I figured that although at this stage he could cry and wail loudly, he couldn’t shout obscenities like “why are you doing this to me Mama!”   I was not brave enough, or disciplined enough, to settle my baby on my own so I called Cradle 2 Kindy to help me.  After all, this was not the first time we would do this, so I had a fair idea of what I was in for. 

Our parenting coach taught us sleep and settling technique for our baby, Alex, first when he was five months old and I was returning to full-time work.  At that stage he would wake up to six times an evening.  The settling worked like a charm and he was sleeping through by the second night.  Unfortunately, an illness, a flooded kitchen and having to move out of our house for two weeks broke his routine when he was about eleven months old.  Being desperate for the peace of mind and clarity that a full night’s sleep brings, we decided it would be worth a shot.

I remember the first evening of settling:  our coach was unswerving in her technique and gently reminded me to get out of the room every time I had difficulties leaving.  Why?  Cause he wailed.  He cried and screamed and thrashed and was very cranky with me.  It broke my heart.  What I didn’t expect was that once he fell asleep the first time that it was not over.  So, at 4 am he woke again and the same procedure took place.  I was devastated and spent the rest of the night in my bed crying.  It’s a tough-love thing and it’s mentally and emotionally exhausting.

The second night was much easier and of course, by the third night he was fast asleep in next to no time and stayed asleep.  At which point I was grateful that I was able to get through the first hideous evening and maintain the determination to break the cycle.  But I still acknowledge and remember how difficult it was.

Since then we have moved house and, of course, have had many a childhood fever.  The difficulty is that their sleep routine can be broken so easily and you have to be so strong.  Alex is almost twenty-months old and, yes, we had a bit of difficulty when we moved homes and he was in a new bedroom.  He seems to have adjusted quite well; however, we have made a conscious decision to accept a degree of broken sleep: he wakes some nights and sleep through others.  When he wakes, he asks for a drink and goes back to sleep.  So we figure, this is acceptable for now.

I strongly recommend a parenting coach from Cradle 2 Kindy to parents who are desperate to sleep.  I can confidently say that the earlier you make the decision, the easier it is.  Would I do it again?  We are expecting another baby and I am certainly going to follow this technique for the newborn if the problem arises.  As for Alex, I dread the idea of having to go through this a second time, so we are very disciplined about when or why we disrupt his sleeping pattern.  After all, the memory is a powerful tool.    Karen – Hurstville, NSW

Also see Services Baby